huntin'
Hunting is an integral part of Southern Country lifestyle. Many times what our dinners were depended on just what sort of critter we were able to outsmart that day. Squirrels were a particular favorite, plentiful and a nice long season, plus they offered all sorts of opportunity for creative assassinations. Many was the day when we would hit the woods well before sunlight to park ourselves under one of many hickory or white oak trees with the plans of a great feast of fried squirrel and gravy. MMM-MMM good!!
The technique is very simple, just sit under a tree, and shoot the squirrel when he moves. Putting this into practice is not so simple.
First you have to stay awake. I have slept away many a morning, only waking up when the eleven a.m. breeze gently awakened me from dreams of monster bucks in the approaching deer season. (Later my dreams changed to those of cheerleaders but that's another story.) So you have to come up with ways to stay awake. This is where the problems start.
One of my best friends is Robert. He lived a few miles from us and was a constant companion for my cousin Ricky and myself. One of the best things about Robert is that he is always game for something new. He is also fearless. He's also not as big and bulky as my cousin and myself so he didn't get hurt so much since he didn't land as hard as we might. This was our thinking when we came up with the idea to send him into the trees to chase the squirrels out.
You see, after you spot a squirrel, and they spot you, they will hide if the trees are full of leaves. Later in the year they will simply run, making them easy pickin's, but when the leaves are on, they're mighty hard to find. So, the natural thing to do if you want squirrel stew for dinner is to send Robert into the tree after them, and hopefully you shoo them to another tree and BANG!!, squirrel's on the menu.
Robert had a great deal of fun clambering around tree tops chasing squirrels but as with all things, he got bored after a while. So he figured he could just sit up in the tree and wait for the squirrel to come to him. We were all for this idea until he asked us to pass his shotgun up to him. Then, with me being the voice of reason I might add, it was realized that maybe having Robert above us shooting Lord only knows what direction at squirrels might not be such a hot idea. Ricky, who went around looking like Ghengis Khan after a sale at the army surplus, passed up a machete instead.
Well Robert was actually quite delighted with this, he figured being the only person we know to whack a squirrel in half forty feet up in a tree was something that would finally make him popular with the girls. (Robert had other issues as well) Anyway, against all expectations, a perhaps less than average intelligence squirrel eventually hopped over to a branch next to Roberts perch.
Robert, perhaps his mind full of thoughts of glory and maybe asking a cheerleader to the prom, reared back and let loose a fierce swing which lo and behold actually connected with the little tree rat disconnecting his head from his body perfectly. Robert didn't have the opportunity to admire his work though, seems in his excitement to go to the prom he had forgotten he should hold on to something. Fortunately there were several large limbs to slow his descent and the ground was pretty soft.
Standing over him with half a squirrel in my hand I could only repeat, "I just can't believe it!, you're gonna be famous Robert!" Ricky was pretty miffed though, seems his machete was still buried halfway through that branch, took Robert nearly ten minutes to climb back up that tree.
Robert had another experience involving a squirrel.
We were out hunting one day and he shot himself a squirrel out of a tree. After picking up the little critter to put him in his vest, he decided to play with him a little. He picked up a little stick and laid the squirrel on his back and began pretending the squirrel was doing little squirrel bench-presses.
He was very entertaining with his antics and had us rolling around on the ground in short order.
He added to the act by pretending the squirrel had revived and was now attacking him. This was just too much for us, our laughter became tears at the sight of him dancing around fighting this little fuzz-ball. What was really fun though was when we realized that the act was over and that he actually had a rather agitated squirrel's teeth sunk quite deeply into his hand.
Seems that his little act of bench presses had revived the squirrel, kinda like cpr if you ask me, and the result was a very animated bushy-tail. Robert ran around in circles for quite a time, swinging his arm around and swearing quite loudly. He expressed a desire for us to shoot the damn thing, but we couldn't even sit up much less pull a trigger. Finally he resolved the situation by repeatedly banging hand and squirrel against a nearby tree, sending the little fella and a not unsizable chunk of hand sailing through the air.
Robert now had revenge on his mind and became the only person I know who has killed two squirrels with a machete.
I have had my own problems involving squirrels.
I grew up on a horse farm and had my own horse for my daily chores and regular riding pleasure. I ride "Injun" style, bareback and no bridle, just a seagrass string halter. This makes it easy to just slide on and off and you don't have to mess with all that other stuff and the horse doesn't get all sweaty. It can also make for some interesting rides.
Most of my hunting I do with a handgun, I'm heavily into archery, but it's always been simpler to just tote a pistol around. I've killed many a squirrel using my .22 Smith and Wesson, but never thought to hunt off horseback.
It really seemed like a good idea.
So there I was, riding along the side of the creek on my big 16 1/2 hand Morgan, peering up into the leaves of a pecan tree looking for dinner. A nice big fox squirrel gave himself away with a twich of the tail, I stopped my horse and leaned against a nearby tree to steady myself. In short order I was on target and tastin' that tender treat and as I completed my trigger squeeze I knew he was mine.
I should have considered what the reaction of my horse might be when he heard gunfire two feet behind his head. It was not pretty. I estimate I sailed a minimum of ten feet straight up. With air time long enough for me to admire the changing foliage from a new perspective. I impacted with the ground at a speed previously associated only with satellites as they crash to Earth. It was not a pleasant experience and I decided that if I were ever able to catch that fool horse I would not try shooting off him again.
The technique is very simple, just sit under a tree, and shoot the squirrel when he moves. Putting this into practice is not so simple.
First you have to stay awake. I have slept away many a morning, only waking up when the eleven a.m. breeze gently awakened me from dreams of monster bucks in the approaching deer season. (Later my dreams changed to those of cheerleaders but that's another story.) So you have to come up with ways to stay awake. This is where the problems start.
One of my best friends is Robert. He lived a few miles from us and was a constant companion for my cousin Ricky and myself. One of the best things about Robert is that he is always game for something new. He is also fearless. He's also not as big and bulky as my cousin and myself so he didn't get hurt so much since he didn't land as hard as we might. This was our thinking when we came up with the idea to send him into the trees to chase the squirrels out.
You see, after you spot a squirrel, and they spot you, they will hide if the trees are full of leaves. Later in the year they will simply run, making them easy pickin's, but when the leaves are on, they're mighty hard to find. So, the natural thing to do if you want squirrel stew for dinner is to send Robert into the tree after them, and hopefully you shoo them to another tree and BANG!!, squirrel's on the menu.
Robert had a great deal of fun clambering around tree tops chasing squirrels but as with all things, he got bored after a while. So he figured he could just sit up in the tree and wait for the squirrel to come to him. We were all for this idea until he asked us to pass his shotgun up to him. Then, with me being the voice of reason I might add, it was realized that maybe having Robert above us shooting Lord only knows what direction at squirrels might not be such a hot idea. Ricky, who went around looking like Ghengis Khan after a sale at the army surplus, passed up a machete instead.
Well Robert was actually quite delighted with this, he figured being the only person we know to whack a squirrel in half forty feet up in a tree was something that would finally make him popular with the girls. (Robert had other issues as well) Anyway, against all expectations, a perhaps less than average intelligence squirrel eventually hopped over to a branch next to Roberts perch.
Robert, perhaps his mind full of thoughts of glory and maybe asking a cheerleader to the prom, reared back and let loose a fierce swing which lo and behold actually connected with the little tree rat disconnecting his head from his body perfectly. Robert didn't have the opportunity to admire his work though, seems in his excitement to go to the prom he had forgotten he should hold on to something. Fortunately there were several large limbs to slow his descent and the ground was pretty soft.
Standing over him with half a squirrel in my hand I could only repeat, "I just can't believe it!, you're gonna be famous Robert!" Ricky was pretty miffed though, seems his machete was still buried halfway through that branch, took Robert nearly ten minutes to climb back up that tree.
Robert had another experience involving a squirrel.
We were out hunting one day and he shot himself a squirrel out of a tree. After picking up the little critter to put him in his vest, he decided to play with him a little. He picked up a little stick and laid the squirrel on his back and began pretending the squirrel was doing little squirrel bench-presses.
He was very entertaining with his antics and had us rolling around on the ground in short order.
He added to the act by pretending the squirrel had revived and was now attacking him. This was just too much for us, our laughter became tears at the sight of him dancing around fighting this little fuzz-ball. What was really fun though was when we realized that the act was over and that he actually had a rather agitated squirrel's teeth sunk quite deeply into his hand.
Seems that his little act of bench presses had revived the squirrel, kinda like cpr if you ask me, and the result was a very animated bushy-tail. Robert ran around in circles for quite a time, swinging his arm around and swearing quite loudly. He expressed a desire for us to shoot the damn thing, but we couldn't even sit up much less pull a trigger. Finally he resolved the situation by repeatedly banging hand and squirrel against a nearby tree, sending the little fella and a not unsizable chunk of hand sailing through the air.
Robert now had revenge on his mind and became the only person I know who has killed two squirrels with a machete.
I have had my own problems involving squirrels.
I grew up on a horse farm and had my own horse for my daily chores and regular riding pleasure. I ride "Injun" style, bareback and no bridle, just a seagrass string halter. This makes it easy to just slide on and off and you don't have to mess with all that other stuff and the horse doesn't get all sweaty. It can also make for some interesting rides.
Most of my hunting I do with a handgun, I'm heavily into archery, but it's always been simpler to just tote a pistol around. I've killed many a squirrel using my .22 Smith and Wesson, but never thought to hunt off horseback.
It really seemed like a good idea.
So there I was, riding along the side of the creek on my big 16 1/2 hand Morgan, peering up into the leaves of a pecan tree looking for dinner. A nice big fox squirrel gave himself away with a twich of the tail, I stopped my horse and leaned against a nearby tree to steady myself. In short order I was on target and tastin' that tender treat and as I completed my trigger squeeze I knew he was mine.
I should have considered what the reaction of my horse might be when he heard gunfire two feet behind his head. It was not pretty. I estimate I sailed a minimum of ten feet straight up. With air time long enough for me to admire the changing foliage from a new perspective. I impacted with the ground at a speed previously associated only with satellites as they crash to Earth. It was not a pleasant experience and I decided that if I were ever able to catch that fool horse I would not try shooting off him again.
posted by PK at 10:54 PM
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